Current Status: Relatively Employed

You know how I was saying that I stepped out of the college gates for the last time this year a few days ago? I lied. Sorry.
So on Wednesday I was asked to go in and photocopy around 175 letters and put them inside 175 envelopes along with a brochure each, then seal them and stick a label on all of them, one for each of the school leavers from our college this year. Let me explain some things: Dad's girlfriend (Jennie) is the PR-marketing-type lady working at the college to promote and recieve funds for the newly built Kapiti College Gym. It's supposed to be finished next year, and although I haven't seen inside, I've seen pictures and articles in the local papers (Jennie has contacts). We're hoping to raise (don't hold your breath) $600,000 in a year, and that year started two years ago. Sorry, I actually don't know when it started, I just wanted to get a joke in there. Here, I'll make up for it - if anyone out there wants to donate, I think you still can at kapitigym.co.nz.
Secondly, the job was more like a misleading business venture advertisement: "Get it finished in 5 easy steps!" was code for "You might be able to finish in 8, maybe 9 seemingly easy but actually surprisngly fiendishly diabolical steps". Not that that was on purpose, it was more of my own fault that it took longer than expected.

What it said on the instructions:
Step 1. Photocopy in colour, 175 copies of letter.
Step 2. Get 175 A4 envelopes from staff office.
Step 3. Get 175 gym brochures from Principal's secretary.
Step 4. Stick labels enclosed on A4 envelope, add 1 brochure and 1 letter
Step 5. Seal and stick in the post.

What really happened:
Step 1. Wake up at what seems to be one hour too early, so get prepared slower than usual, then get told that you actually did wake up at the right time, and rush around for the next ten minutes before getting in the car.
Step 1A. Skip breakfast.
Step 2. Get to school at 8:30, and proceed to library to commence photocopying.
Step 3. Attempt opening library door.
Step 3A. Realise that the librarian isn't in the library yet, and wait for her arrival to unlock the door (ETA - 30 minutes)
Step 3B. Further realise that it is Wednesday, so therefore school doesn't start until 10:20, so continue waiting.
Step 4. Try door again after ten minutes, hoping that it was magically unlocked.
Step 5. That failing, proceed to the student office to find a master key.
Step 6. Ask receptionists nicely to borrow their master key. Priror trust is cruical for this step.
Step 7. Unlock library and return key.
Step 8. Get letter to copy out of giant envelope with instructions.
Step 8A. Find some twink to cover the unseeable blotches on paper.
Step 8B. Alternatively, find a white pencil.
Step 8C. After finding out that the pencil does not work, find some scissors and cut pieces of scrap paper large enough to cover blotches in the margins.
Step 8D. Look for cellotape.
Step 8E. That failing, spend 20 minutes trying to coordinate the small pieces of paper to land directly underneath the letter on the document glass on the photocopier.
Step 8F. Repeat previous step at least twice to get it nearly perfect.
Step 9. Try to get the copier to charge to the administration account, then realise you'll need a PIN number and a copy card. Panic.
Step 10. Leave library to go to student office and ask about Step 9.
Step 11. Recieve copy card requiring no PIN.
Step 12. Commence copying, by this time the librarian should have arrived.
Step 13. Head over to the Principal's secretary, collect an unknown amount of Gym brochures. Deposit them in the library.
Step 14. Go to staff office.
Step 14A. Wait at least 30 minutes while they finish farewelling two members of the teaching staff, until a admin member visited previously asks the staff office receptionist politely to come out to her desk.
Step 14B. Apoligise numerous times about bringing her out of the staff briefing.
Step 14C. Recieve assurance that she wanted to get on with some work anyway.
Step 15. Ask for 175 A4 envelopes.
Step 15A. Recieve answer that the school only just ordered some.
Step 15B. Open two the recently delivered, large parcels by the door.
Step 15C. The staff office receptionist will now confirm that she may not have enough A4 envelopes, and brings out a half-used box, suggesting that you use "Half-A4" envelopes.
Step 15D. Panic again, text message Jennie about whether or not "Half-A4" envelopes are suitable, and commence counting envelopes in the box.
Step 15E. Receive reply that the other envelopes are OK.
Step 16. Take a mostly full box of "Half-A4" envelopes back to the library. By now the printing should have stopped.
Step 17. Proceed by creating a sandwich stack consisting of one Gym brochure, then a letter, then a brochure, etc. until the brochure pile is exausted.
Step 18. Take the pile, and fold each a brochure and a letter together, and create a pile of... what do you call it? Bretters? Whatever.
Step 19. Take an envlope out, stuff each one with a bretter, and lie them out in columns of 28 (number of name labels on two sheets of them), until you run out of bretters (which totals way less than 175).
Step 20. Begin calculating how many more brochures you will need.
Step 20A. Lose count at least twice.
Step 21. Collect more brochures and repeat steps 17-19.
Step 21A. Midway through step 21, get offered three Fruit Bursts. Accept.
Step 21B. Consume all three within 15 minutes.
Step 22. Go back to staff office to collect a box to put finished envelopes inside.
Step 22A. Begin sticking name labels on each envelope, remembering to skip your own name. Seal each envelope.
Step 22B. Get a back ache while doing the aforementioned step.
Step 22C. Fill the box.
Step 23. Repeat steps 22-22C, instead with two boxes.
Step 23A. Return copy card that you forgot that you left in your wallet.
Step 24. Eventually take all three boxes full of sealed envelopes to the student office to get them sent.
Step 25. Go back to the library, check how long the whole job took, then cram as much free office supplies as you can into the instructional envelope.
Step 25A. Charge $1.20/hour (family rate), give Jennie a message that you've finished (and that it costs $5), and go home.

And that's not the whole post!

Skipping ahead to today, a couple of things to note. Unfortunately today is the day that my Japanese friend Naoto begins his trip back to Japan. He's been here in New Zealand for three years now, and I'm sure I'm gonna miss him. But I'll try and visit him in Japan when I do a gap year or something after University. He'll be in Auckland now, he flies out at midnight tonight.

Now to explain the title: I GOT A JOB!!!
I was actually looking for jobs and that this morning, had lunch, and in the afternoon I was just getting back into it when I got a call from Harvey Norman in Porirua! Added bonus: He wanted to immediately upgrade me from part time to full time, and he wanted me to start tomorrow! Sound too good to be true? Sort of.
Later that evening after I had come back from Naoto's homestay, the same guy called up again, and said that one of the people that said they were going actually weren't, but he would call me back about starting sometime next week. So not all hope is lost. Hence I am relatively employed.

Ooh! And I almost forgot. It's my friend Kyle's... I think it's 18th, birthday today! Checked your email recently, Kyle?

What I've stumbled upon: This is a new format experiment, since I gave you a YouTube link yesterday (which I'm being told doesn't make sense), so here's a simple-ish and original puzzle game I found a few days ago. Give it a try here.